Happy 5th (Born) Birthday Baby Girl....Original Post Oct 8, 2012

  

What a blessing to have collaborated with the Universe to bring forth this new life...  She is truly the "fullness of my SACRED DESIRE within" and she undoubtedly "brings forth DIVINE LIGHT".  She is my amazing...  

Through her smile, her voice, her laugh I live and I am honored that she chose me to walk this journey with her...Giving thanks.  I am humbled by her grace and I revel in her wisdom.  Her spunk is infectious and her charisma is SOUL NOURISHING.  To know her is to want to know her more...in each moment with her I grow closer to GOD....

In LOVE...IN LOVE....

My 'baaya....

21 Days of Gratitude- I AM THANKFUL....for heightened AWARENESS-Original Post November 2012

How time flies!  Amazing we have been in Belize over 2 months.  I spoke to a girlfriend some time ago about how things in Belize are so slow and I agree that they are.  Things like people rushing about, or billions of cars speeding up and down the highways going who knows where.  Things we see at home in the states and just take for granted that this is how things are supposed to be.  Not so in Belize.  Yes people are still going to and fro and yes there are cars in Belize but there is a different feel.  A much more easy going, laid back FEEEEEEEEL.

Still despite this ironically I feel time is flying and on second glance the days go by incredibly quickly.




Maybe it is the literally cooking 3 meals a day, or the endless tasks of sweeping, mopping (oh wait do really do that so much), washing and hanging clothes on the line, filling water jugs (sorry not from a well just the 5 gallon bottle to the gallon jugs), etc that find me in this place.

So when I saw the 21 Days of Gratitude http://inspiredbyfamilymag.com/2012/10/30/21-days-of-gratitude-challenge-for-the-whole-family/# and clicked on the link to find that Day 6 (today...the day that I am starting) was gratitude for an emotion I decided to be thankful for heightened awareness (that's an emotion right?).

One of the most difficult things about being in Belize has been being away from my community.  Yea Nashville is my community but when I say my community I mean MY COMMUNITY (if you feeeeeeeel me say whoop whoop!).  My community is a place of comfort, strength, support, refuge, wisdom, beauty and joy!  Within my community the talents and gifts are endless, there are kids by the bucketfuls and each of the many Mamas, Grannies, Papaws, Aunties, Uncles, Babas and Daddy's come with their own script...there own ideas and way of being that is priceless.

So I know you are saying what does this have to do with awareness right?  Well it took me coming waaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyy over here to Belize to be fully awareness of how important this is to me.  How much I thrive in this community of mine, how much a part of me each member is and how very blessed I am to have them/it in this lifetime.

What I have also become increasingly aware of is how all of those characteristics of my community are also found in me...

I AM STRENGTH
I AM COMFORT
I AM SUPPORT
I AM WISDOM
I AM BEAUTY
I AM JOY (can I say that again?)
I AM JOY
I AM JOY
I AM JOY
I AM JOY
I AM REFUGE....

So when my children are afraid of the endless pack of dogs I am strength.  When they miss their Baba, their family and friends I am comfort.  When I can't figure out which babysitter to go with I am wisdom.  Or when I get lost in my own sadness I AM JOY!!!!!!

Being connected to such a community increases my awareness of my connection with the CREATOR...my Endless SOURCE...and from which my heightened awareness originated....ABUNDANTLY....

I AM thankful for this experience Being ME in Belize!

I AM thankful for each of you!
I AM thankful for my ABUNDANT SOURCE of Gratitude...

When GOD says Yes....

So I have been here in Belize for 10 months already...I know you're like uhhhh thought you just got there.  Well truth is that is how it feels.  How time flies when you are having fun and even if you're not.  So part of me being here has been about me finding my way.  Trying to figure out what's next, where will we go and what will we do.

For the past 6-7 months or so I have had this idea and while I felt like YEAH! this is it when it first came to me, sometime afterwards I was like uhhhhh....this feels like everything else.  What I mean is that I am the QUUUUEEEEEEN of a good idea but in the end a lot of my ideas don't stick with me.  Not that they are not good ideas just that they are not necessarily good for now.  Still I didn't discard it (as I never really do any of my ideas) but this time I just held it and let it stew and prayed and tried to listen (still listening) and I think this may be it.  In the last week or so I have had two REALLY good links to this idea and I am thinking we may have lift off.

I recently read something (don't ask me where-oh here it is-http://www.echoinggreen.org/work-on-purpose/ten-principles ):

"Fear Means Go
Distinguish between healthy fears and the kind of barrier fears that stem from your insecurities. Your barrier fears are signals that you need to GO…not away from that which scares you, but toward it."

(This is going to be on MY Oprah Master Class by the way)

I don't know if this resonates with anyone reading this but "ironically" enough I had just acknowledged that I am afraid when I found this.  I am afraid of failing yes but I am also afraid of succeeding.  I realized too that I am having all of these dialogues in my head about what I don't know and how I can't ask and what if I get there and I just can't do it...then I found this.  Cognitive Behavior Therapy (cause you know I'm a Master's level social worker now-woop! woop!) says that when you are having these negative dialouges you counteract them with a positive one.  

So instead of saying I can't, I'm saying light my path and lead the way.  Instead of saying I don't know I'm saying I need help and when GOD says YES I'll be ready.  Like the guy that knew how he would spend his lottery money before he won it....

SO even though I'm still a little afraid...ok a lot...I'm saying instead SEND ME I"LL GO!